Domestic Violet

Okay so . . .

. . . I'm 19 months pregnant

due any month now - carrying quadruplets

(3 girls and a boy just to even things out in the family)

Oh and I'll be leaving with the circus in the morning

going to tour the BIGTOP circuit around the country with a

high-wire partner who hopes to take me higher

and higher on the wire without a net

inducing labor by the second or third show

you know so we can get on with . . .

seeing the world

inside the tent

with the lion tamer

fat lady and the fire-eating guys

who we party with after hours

inviting the sideshow freaks to join us cuz

they make all the money

and even the elephants get a

shot

well really a bucket full of whiskey

and you haven’t lived ‘til you’ve seen

a tipsy elephant trying to look mean

cross-eyed

trunk out of control

right before he wobbles and falls

into his den

where his woman has been waiting for him

all night long

all pissed off

and then it’s

ON......!

April fools!!!! (now THIS is Fiction!)

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

They called her crazy . . .

among other nouns

and superlative nomencalture

pushing off their

insanity

saying it was hers somehow

and the only way to

defend

was to become like them

when she wasn't in the first place and

would not be in the end

and they called her crazy

when she told the truth

when it didn't line up with the version they

conjured up collectively

folie duex

when she rejected her husband's ugliness

they gathered him to their clan and made him feel

a friend

enabling his alibi and there and then

they called her crazy and again when

she would not partake the demon rum with them

refusing to destroy all she had built from

the ash of destruction

and they called her crazy when she would not heed their

chaotic instruction or

bow to their

opinion

and would not co-sign their rush to judgement

or bait and switch schadenfruede-ish

along with the idea that she needed a

man

to keep her safe and dry

and provide the money supply

and they called her crazy and repeated the lie

to all who would listen

positioning her under mass transit tires

in keeping with their unlovely 

desires

to take from her

any and all that jealousy can

and

they

called

her

crazy . . .

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

 

The apology . . .

. . . twice today

I apologized

to

Nature

for

Nature -

as if the natural order

were in my power

somehow -

as if the divine plan

somehow became

uncommon -

an aberrant event !

I first said

" I'm so sorry ! " -

to perennials

petunias and tomatoes

for the

life-choking

Cottonwood cotton

layered

in inches

all over them

by 4 immense trees

next door to the east

pulled by the western sun

to tower over

my yard mostly

and not the yard they

grow from ~

" I'm sorry " I said

and " damn those woolly

bully trees "

as I began to

uncover

everything grown and

growing

by my hand -

fruits of my labor

choking to death

every year

at this time -

the rescue reverie

interrupted

by the insistent

squawking of a

Robin pair

whose baby has been

caught

by the neighbor's cat -

who is coming around the corner

with a brand new

feather beard and

mustache !!!

He sat down in the middle of

my backyard

and devoured

the young one

in front of God

and me

and another horrified neighbor

as the baby's parents dive-bombed him

trying to get close enough to

peck

his eyes out

but then

he's a cat -

doing what cats do

best

and King of the Jungle

he looked like to me

as I

walked away -

did not want to see -

telling parents who

objected

cried

bitched

grieved and lamented

for hours

until

darkness fell ~

" I'm so sorry " . . .

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

 

 

Just about the time . . .

 

. . . I knew all the ways

and means

in which I had been

wrong

and wronged -

they threw me

down

to the land of the

unforgiven ~

Just about the time

I stood back up

with grace and dignity

integrity

prepared to

make right

my own

street -

they played basketball

with me

and kicked me to

the ground ~

Just at the precise

moment

of transformation

its final

Hell

at

inner core -

they turned their

backs

and closed the

door ~

Right when

Love and

Mercy

filled me up

for them -

they struck a

blow

that almost

killed me and

damn the evil

that smiles at

that

which left me

orphaned

ever more ~

Just as I

turned

away

as well -

disbelieving

grieving

as death's

living Hell -

I found they

wished me

there

with care and

collective

mission

and became

therefore undeserving of

my

company

unlike those who

surround me

now -

who do not dwell

in houses

made of

glass

while peddling

stones and

sass ~

Just about the instant

of surrender

I remembered

who I am

still

and silent

amended

appended

suspended

in the cyber of

spiritual

space -

enlightening

metamorphosis

miraculous

restoration

exoneration

in motion -

forgiving

that they

know not

when they entered

the play

in the late

last acts

with no program

issued at the

door

and I'm blinded

by the chill

of the cold

in the

heartless

hapless and

mindless

karmic

boomerang

born of chaos and its

to

themselves ~

Just about the time

it hits . . .

they may remember

claiming nolo contendre

for the

send

but will be sure to

come to know

what it means

that I never left them

when

they needed me

most

and at the same

time

as from a hot stove

I move

my hand -

as follows the dictates

of sanity -

and it shall not be

extended

again -

for it is only the

insane

and those filled with

self-loathing

who keep doing

that which is not

in their best interest

over and over and over

again ~

Just about the

second

I recall them

from the past -

they make me

smile

briefly

automatically -

like everyone does

at a beautiful

child

or sunset

and then I cry

that we grew to be

strangers -

that after

ALL

they know

essentially little

about the

essential

me

and even more

lamenting comes

from the application of

spiritual axiom

in quotations

by Herbert Spencer

which states --------------

" There is a principle which is

a bar against

all information -

which is proof against

all arguments

and which cannot fail

to keep a man in

everlasting

ignorance -

that principle is

contempt

prior to

investigation " ~

Just about the time . . .

. . . I tried to gather

data -

no response

returned

while they made

no

inquiry      . . . .  . .  . . . . .  . . . . .

filling in the blanks with

whatever and

OH WELL -

they live in

different

spaces

and come from

more similar

places

than I

ever did or could or

ever will

but still I

have compassion

from the greatness

of my heart

for those who

don't want to

know much

or grow much

beyond the status

quo

and wish them

peace and

harmony and

everlasting

well ~

Just about the time . . .

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

hysteria -

they have sent

Is it true ?

they ask me . . .

some folks do -

they can't believe that

half of it is

true . . . !!!!!!!!!!!!

. . . and no I don't hear voices

and no I'm not making shit up !

Are Ya Crazy ?

or what ?

The point gets lost

in your translation

while I'm saying what I'm meaning and

not something else -

not the version you think

you hear me say ??????? ( What the hell is that - are you hearing voices ? - paraphrasing and

rearranging what I'm saying ? )

through your many filters

that are

clogged and dented up  ?  ~ what the fuck !!!!!!!!

I'm not the creative fiction

writer

yet  ( see future posts: FICTION - will always be specified as such ! )

Are ya Nuts ?

For a long time

I have been

confining my

commentary to

Real Life and its

creative expressions

and my own impressions

universally comprehended

by those with half a head

and even you * - and

*this is known as sarcasm

to some of you sarcastic ones

too -

and remember if you can -

the guy who has been under

the bed

looks there !

and  " I've been EVERYWHERE

man " - like the words of a

sixties folk-rock song

so " I'm Alright " from Kenny Loggins

and " I'm good from where I've been up to now " - Me ( Now ) . . . . . . .

. . . " And what a long strange trip it's been " - from

the Best of the grateful Dead in the early 70's

In the 80's Simply Red was busy

" Holding Back the Years "

and I was busy having babies

and I'm really good     for, with, and from that

too

and yes it's true

every word

and especially MY part

and responsibilities

and it's been a long time

since I lied about a thing - Six years and three weeks ago on the phone

I lied to Billy the Blockhead -

about whether or not I was drinking

alcohol -

when the dumbshit could hear

the icecubes tinkling !!! - and it was none of his business anyhow -

I just did not want to hear his critical Parent come out and start

bitching - that's all

how 'bout you ?

yeah sarcastic

aren't I ?

      there I go again !

but it's O.K. when I'm kind of

friendly with

my character and its

defects

how 'bout you ?

you hot too ? *

( * you'll need to refer to post: The Something Nothing Sound -

in the Poetry section -

to make sense of this one )

and I've always loved a

treasure hunt !

You too ?

Meanwhile -

back at Kitty Fork

home of Bignfatncat

at the keyboard

finally

later in the story

of my life

I write

to -

for -

about - me and you and us

whoever we are

despite your part if you had one

or not

your part is not what it is all about - it's just

not the same without it when

the story is mine

alone

and I am not !

I am a survivor of DOMESTIC VIOLENCE - however

ever mindful of your deepest

darkness which I cannot in good

conscience

divulge ~

What I write is my life and is

common knowledge

to all parties

concerned or

"  . . . so unconcerned

a tree must be to never bother trying

a different way of getting green

like paint or theft or

lying  . . . " - Me again from 1991

so

no bombs will be or have been

dropping

this is no land-mine

field -

only my take ( and I have more than one perspective

on everything I ever experienced - how 'bout you ?)

need be

revealed

so you have a built in shield

from the levels of truth you fear . . .

and yes it's all true !

Life Extraordinaire !!!!!!!!!

***^! #~ LIFE ~# ?^*** ~ size: LARGE

and from here - just a reminder -

identifying with the subject matter

or not

is up to you - all 6.7 billion of you are welcome to

and as far as I can tell

the only ones who read Domestic Violet

are the people closest

to me

or maybe some who sport black eyes

or some who just want to fight

as well !

. . . and I've been every where and

I Love all ya'll crazies even if

you have no faith -

anyway ! - look it up

as in despite -   NOT   to spite  -

look it up ya big duck !

and where is your sense of humor - you're not a librarian

are you ?

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

 

 

Shoulda Coulda Woulda

I could and

I would

but when you

say I

should

then I won't and

I can't

but when you say

I could

then I may or

I will

but

when you say you would and

that I should too

then I want to know

when you do

what you say you will

and find out if you still

think I should

or

has it become

could ?

Have you seen the

difference ?

1993

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

 

 

Just an idea . . .

. . . we are to LOVE people and

USE things -

not USE people and

LOVE things !

Just an idea passed on

to me somewhere along

a long long line

of long long

time

and it's just an ideal idea

oft times not easily

realized

when too many times we

place more importance on

money and things -

the OBJECT/THING holding more value

for us than any personally personal

stuff with persons who

we claim to LOVE !!

This is something I've done serious work on

within my SELF

and I've never been too impressed by too much

STUFF

in the first place so

it hasn't been all that tough

to get a better way going on about it

in my life

and of course this required an open mind to a new

 

paradigm !

Others have other ideas however

( and I can't help but see )

as they display a real strange twist in this

unfortunately too many times in front of me

I'm referring to the idiot material types

who really think they are what they "drive"

or what their house costs

or that the accumulation of their closets and knick-knacks

trinkets and whatnot

somehow has something to do with their

intrinsic value

when in fact it takes $18.76 to build a human being

out of chemical jars so

that means we are ALL worth

equally

less than a twenty dollar bill

across the board in terms of dollars and cents

yet each of us priceless and precious and

unique

in reality !

Just a thought !

The idea that PEOPLE are more important than Stuff

is not new to me but

it became necessary to examine the principles

some years ago

of 'give and take' and other spiritual concepts -

fine tuning the idea that all things come from one

SOURCE

and we are all merely messengers and couriers

and are CONGRUOUS or not ~ it means our actions and attitudes

line up

with our beliefs and values !!??

Congruity is very important to me after many years

of what I believed

not lining up sometimes with

what I said or did

when what I believed stayed in my head and

what YOU wanted to hear came out

instead

especially if you were a

man who was abusing me

and God only knows what I

might think I needed to say or do

if I feared losing YOU !

Or feared anyone or anything ~

Such is one by-product of FEAR

which I was riddled with

from a life of abuse

so I found some

new ideas

regarding

people

things

and USE

and though

I have legitimate

concerns in life today

the fear factor has mostly

been taken away and replaced

by Faith and unconditional though discriminate

GIVING instead and the ability at times

to graciously RECEIVE when it's necessary to

ask for help and fearlessly as well

what I really feel and believe has become

easy to tell !!!!!!

Most folks neither give nor receive with much

grace

caught up in the rat race of the

dog eat dog

" gotta win " world

falsely prideful when in need and

suffering silently -

the fuel for MARTYRDOM and all of the "          ism's "

and most folks do their giving with big thick rope

not even mere strings

attached

and of course because most are

obsessed with prosecution and persecution in

this life

there will be punishment issued

to the needy

for needing

who are already in strife !

Go figure and

watch your thought life

Thought becomes word becomes

deed ~

Just a thought !

And if you want to share yours

on this or any other matter

you are welcomed to do so in the

comments below . . .

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

I thought you said Mitch . . .

. . ." so what'll you have Mitch ? "   asked the bartender Sami

No one answered

so I looked where her eye

seemed to travel

and the guy on my right

apparently did not hear her

so I tapped him on the shoulder

" She is talking to you "

I informed him

and looked back at her with

a grin

She exclaimed " I don't mean him -

I was talking to you  Bitch !

You and I are having a shot

now what kind do you want ? "

I dissolve in hysterics at

this faux paux of mine

They are both looking at me

like I've just lost my mind !

" I thought you said Mitch !

(RotFlmao)

didn't hear you quite right !

And I'll have a Silk Panties

straight up with no ice -

Thank you so much Sami

no one has called me Bitch

all night " !!!

( I haven't been home from work yet )

You see - Bitch is a new

nickname of mine

She gave it to me affectionately

cuz she's a bigger Bitch than

I am !!!

Domestic Violet 1993

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

 

 

Other People

All my young life I wanted to be like all the other people I see

I wanted to come from some other family and could not be

happy

just being

just me

My Dad was too strict and my Mother too busy

while the differences in them just made me all

dizzy

He said this         she said that

and they could not agree on the

discipline needed for a someone like me

I was sure in the next house this just did not go on

and I knew other people knew

how it should be done

Other Dads weren't so crazy

other Mom's weren't so worn

other kids certainly did not tremble

from imminent harm

Other girls had their own rooms

without sisters to share

Other girls had been blessed with

the right colored hair

Other girls had cute short legs

and eyes bright and blue

Other girls were their friends and

boys accepted them too

I was sure they had everything

they could ever want

as they came to school daily

just to boast and to flaunt

I was sure I was less than and even had less than that

and self-conscious self-pity made me start to get fat !

I befriended the friendless

never teased or made fun

for I felt just like they did

like a mis-fitting one

In their homes I sought refuge

in their beds I did sleep

Other families did love me

and their secrets I keep

I was sure I was not one of the fortunate ones

until I shared at their tables and saw where

they came from

Some had nothing and loved me and gave

all that they had

Some had all

but were poor

in their spirit

so sad

Other people had more

others less than poor me

and we all carry bruises where

no one can see

Some neglected

some wounded

black and blue on their backs

Some rejected

given things to

make up what they lack 

" for 'tis better to eat rice in a

warm loving home than to feast

in a family where all love is gone "

( Proverbs )

Other people had new clothes and

pain in their eyes

Other people had old clothes and

love realized

Other people I'm sure now

have their burdens to bear

Other people with myself now

I can't even compare

For I still find it hard to

strike out or make fun

as I eat rice and feel loved -

I'm the fortunate one

I am sure that I have everything I could want

in the lessons I've learned

as I've searched and I've sought

Looking long

looking hard

at the meaning in all of it

Other people think I have

all that they really want

It's relative

like my ceiling

is your floor and

what you left behind 

is a treasure

in disguise  . . .

Domestic Violet Child

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

 

 

 

Ain't No Bimbo

. . . in a recent gathering of

easels

a white haired gent

joined the group with

" What a great day

to play

hooky !

How 'bout a keg

in the park - instead ? "

And I thought about days

and parks

and kegs

for a moment

reminiscing in remembered

good times and warm sun

and it made me smile

a bit wider than I planned on

" Whaddya say ? "

said he looking hopeful

at the twinkle in my eye

" None for me thanks - no

I haven't partaken of amber

ale under pressure

topped with frothy white

in a large sum of time -

but parks are good places for easels

and sun and it is a real

beautiful day "

" Well then you would be

OUT OF IT  soon after one or two

after such a long time

wouldn't you now ? "

he said looking hopeful

in a different way now

I could see the wheels turning

no matter his age

the look in his eye

in a flash

for an instant

from his instinct

he was simply a man

and he could " get the job done "

all men are tryin' to do

if I would take a drink or

two or ten

he was hoping !

So I simply said

" I drank just enough and

thank you - no

I won't be joining you today

but I'll bet the scenery

at the park will be great

so enjoy ! "

As I live and breath

I can hardly believe

an old man with an

easel and a keg in the car

tried to

' pick me up '

get me to skip school

and get me drunk

in Painting III . . .

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

 

 

 

 

 

 

A la mode

Life ~

is just a big fat pie

cut into too many

sections

too many times

with you in the center

a mark of mush from

too many passes

by the blade

with pieces missing ~

The crusty parts

require work and

give respite from

the sweet euphoric

fill

and a real thrill

is a bite of both

and time

to lick from your lips

the memory . . .

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

Pinche Malinche

While attempting to become

officially bi-lingual

once again

in the hands of an

instructor

of incredible talent

as he pulls from my cerebral stuff

a language already there

dormant for most of life

With some history to boot

he traces the first " Mexican "

to the child born of

the Spanish exploiter and destroyer

of the AZTECS

Hernan Cortez

and his mistress the native Malinche

Aztec priestess

who is thought of as the

great betrayer of her people

While discussing colorful Spanish or

" cochinadas "

one of the worst insults " La Chingada "

can be meaning

"a woman who has been raped "

or also referring to

Malinche

" Pinche " means damned

The pinche Malinche

came in the middle of class

taught by my bald Professor

with a Scandinavian last name

as he went through many pages of

alphabetized insults

and when he got to " Pelon Pelacas "

I recalled my bald Professor grandfather

who taught Spanish

with a Scandinavian last name

married to my grandmother from Spain

This flash from the past immediately gave me

a headache

and said out loud " Oh my God - they called each other names ! "

" Pelon Pelacas " means making fun of people with bald heads

or crew cuts

implying they are foolish

apparently in Spanish-speaking cultures

if you can't grow hair

then you're also considered stupid

and I know I've heard " pinche "

thrown around in a not nice way

back in the

day

long ago

far away ~

We cracked up at the irony

the bald Spanish Professor with a Scandinavian

last name

and me

today

when I told him the story

" Que gracioso ! " -

about why the language is

in my DNA and grey matter

just waiting to come out

and how Spain and Scandinavian

met up on this side of the sea

" Chingao !!! "

what a pain in my head

for a flash

the memory of " me llamo es "

it all came back to me

and I think when all this

" escuala " is through

I'm going to teach Spanish

too

but first I'll grow some

" beunisimo pela "

" Sigue estudiando ! "

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

Spotless

Life ~

is burly

squirrelly

While we find new

improved methods of

sloth and its

alibi

like making sure

our dishes come out

of the dishwasher

without spots

as messages are

text-ed

by people while they drive

some who have not taken

typing yet

or Driver's Ed

It's squirrelly that we travel at

high rates of speed

within inches of other many-tonned

machines

passing in opposite

directions

and while typing to boot -

but so burly that we are so rude

independently

and abroad

No - not a broad

or maybe so ?

Life ~

is a burly squirrelly

bad bad girl

rode hard and not put away

yet

So crudely stunning

and rough around the edges

with her feet upon the

table

her name is probably

Mabel

and her whiskey makes her woozy

so she's torn the dress

she's

worn too long

and comes on

a little too strong

as expected of a

floozy

Her moments of true

gentility

with ankles neatly crossed

are quickly replaced

by her underlying

hostility

caring only enough to wash

her own face

occasionally

simply to be ready for

the next

time . . .

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

 

 

Back seat bases

Life ~

certain endless-ness

factored in forever days

momentous mad

four-square plays

tether ball

'chicken' with the

best steak knives and

'horse' across the alley

'crack the whip' at Comiskey

and anything risky

Batter up !  on the

diamond

became bases blocked

in the back seat

sure that it was fair

arguing the pointed

point

over a bottle of

Cabernet

comforted by

black light and

well wishing cohorts

the kind

Dylan

and Pabst Blue Ribbon

positively seeking

universal mysteries

beyond the ticking

clock

with voracious soaking up

of latitudes of

literary platitudes

briefly

blocking all

attempts at successful

integration

with the

team

who seldom offered

a ride

up front

carrying some

other captain

on their shoulders

stuffing the

water boy

into the back window

and off to the circus

celebration

for raucous

ridicule

outlined in increments

though none

golden

applied to

one's own ruling

with bases loaded

curve ball saves the

game over and

again as

the bat is broken

striking out

the side that is

as well

as it can be

said she

so will it be done

when the third strikes you

out

of the

dugout

to the mound

with the mit

and some

spit

and polish on

the ball

with a slightly blue

tint

said he

helmet strapped on

moving the muscle

in the jaw

that keeps the truth

from coming out

sweltering

against the cold metal

cup

of consolation

between the seats . . .

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

High-top Ricochets

Life ~

like a terrible

two year old

in your lap ~

sometimes stands up real straight

real fast

up under

your

chin

where you

bleed through

your teeth

or quickly turns to

give you a kiss

a knee in the groin

and mouthful of

slobber ~

The banshee screeches

cheek to cheek

a cochlear

paper cut

and a sturdy

tied-up leather

high-top

can fold you in half

when planted in your

gut ~

Even when still and chill

for a moment

inevitable hand

finds your face

lightning pinkie

drags

your 20/20

with no apology

The back of youthful shoes

bang up thinning shin

on the way

down

resisting your

release

stiffening against your

trajectory

aimed at wanton

liberty

and you're left

near breathless when

the head butts your

breast

outraged at your

attempt ~

High-top ricochets

back in your lap

with an elbow to the

blurring eye

an eventual shiner

insisting status quo

the child

forever crawls

an unrelenting

asp ~

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

Home-eopathy

If my elucidation

brings you consternation

Psyllium husks and a good look

at yourself

could help you

"loosen up"

And if my strong projection

causes character infections

try ridding yourself

naturally

with prayer

for someone besides

yourself

and maybe some

Angelica Flower Essence

My thoughts might give you

hic-cups

but really I don't  care

just drink some Wheat grass

and Lemon juice

and pull your head out

for some fresher

air

and it's O.K.

if I make suggestions

for cleaning up your

mouth

though I'm much less concerned

with what's going in

than the crap that keeps

coming out

You can get the best

truth serum

from the Shaman

down the street

and Chlorophyll

in a tiny pill

will

make your breath

real sweet

If bad taste is

your

companion

it actually helps to eat

Onion

and Garlic to kill the

parasitic life

in your gut

and while you're there

clean the screen on your

stomach made of glass

so you can see where the hell

you

are going

and try reading a book

on Egyptian and Greek

civilizations

or get a new look

choosing 'other than'

what you've already had

and take a multi vitamin

and quit pretending

you're so "BAD!"

And put some water

please - back in

you lose it every way

especially with the stupid ways

you waste your days away

and maybe something new

will actually

soak in

to your thick hard head

and maybe try some 5-HTP

if it's all crazy

there

and meditate

and learn Yoga

Salutation to the SUN

and have some good clean

fun

I'm such a bitch

right ?

I'll bet that's

what you're

thinking

But what your dull spot

cannot yet know is

these are words of love

the same ideas remedied

the same in me

afflictions

along with

Acupuncture

and freed me of

the balance-out

allergies and

asthma

and migraines all my life

and also some

addictions

The one's who came to

save me dearly

gave me the same

harsh message

clearly

and repeatedly

'til I GOT IT

and sometimes weren't this nice

about it

So if your feet fit in

this shoe

like Cinder-fucking-ella

remember that I love you

too

and I'm only tryin' to

help ya . . .

naturally

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

FUCKIN' BOO MAN !

850 times in my life

street lights go out

when I pass underneath

randomly

when I least expect

without pattern or sequence

I look up each time

with " Again ? "

again

fascinated and depressed

simultaneously

wouldn't you be ?

And just last year it

changed

and they come on

now

instead !

I know because I

know

because I 'know'

many things I

can't explain how

like where you REALLY

were

and the deceit 

in what was said and

when people and things go missing -

where they might be

and

the baby was born at

2:06 a.m. and

how some folks got

dead and

who the criminals are

that I can't see

as well as the ones sometimes

right in front of me and

it's especially helpful

to 'know' who the

child molester's are and . . .

are ya scared yet ?

and I drank and drugged

a lot

to shut it

down

out

off

PLEASE !

A leak into the Universe

of

Universal Laws

beyond cause and effect

attached to me

without my permission

or consent

many years

since I was small

unwilling to heed the call

or listen

in the stillness

within

for clear direction

and helpful transmission

I tried so hard to drown it out

and was scared of IT myself

and certainly could not

talk to any one about it

for a long

too long time

and sometimes did the OPPOSITE

in sickening rebellion

of that which I was 'getting'

with disasterous results

when nothing and no one

was going to tell ME what to do . . . . .

. . . . . .

So I have learned to TRUST IT ~

implicitly

like some have learned to trust

what I'm ' getting ' ~

My astral projection

resume'

includes traveling

over treetops in other

parts of the world

while I am sleeping

and putting myself in my

ex-husband's room

from 70 miles away

who called the next day to ask

if that was me who

pinched him in the ass

when no one else

was home

and other such

phenomena

Are ya trembling ?

boy - I sure have

some days

no - I don't read minds

it is not my business

no - I don't hear voices on

a regular basis

no - I don't like having this

GIFT

but I lean in hard

to INTUITIVE guard

that we ALL have

I just KNOW it !

Are ya scared yet ?

Most PEOPLE ARE

to know I know because

I know and can't say why

and some skeptics stopped

responding with

disdain when I warned

a friend

Not to go - PLEASE !

and he did anyway and

wrecked his truck

He admitted his disbelief

from his hospital bed

and never doubted me again

but he was " scared " by

what I know

he said ~

Most are unless they

have IT

too

most of you will be until it

benefits you

Some try to run and hide

like I can see right thru

them

BOOOOOooooooaaaaaAAAAHHHHHHa a a a !

are ya scared yet ?

are ya shakin' ?

Ya wanna go for a ride ?

One time on an Interstate Highway

I turned out the lights of a

whole Park-n-ride

going 75 in the dark

and my companion

turned to ask

" What kind of a mood are you in, anyway ? "

when I don't know how that happens

any more than you do

all along

at all ~

It's not a mood

it's not my choice

my Extra Sensory

tapped into the

voiceless voice

If your aren't nervous by now

let's see what this does for ya ~

I left my favorite jacket

in the saddle bag

last year

of a Harley-Davidson

and lamented so when I

discovered it missing

forgetting where I left it

Thought real hard

and let it go

unwilling to contact the

control-freak driver

I had not talked to

since

when I remembered ~~~

I found it hanging on

my front door knob

delivered by a driver

I had not called

the

next

day !

DOOO doo DOO doo DOO doo DOO doo !

This is normal life in

my every VIOLET day ~

some would call that

co-incidence

in their endless label-making

but I don't believe in co-incidence

at all

no way

HOW COULD I ? ~

And I tried real hard

for many years

to make IT go away

with high anxiety my

constant reward

and how is yours

right now ?

Are ya spooked and skittish

and very very afraid ?

Do something different

and be very very brave

and remember I

don't read minds

no I can't invade your thinking

and wouldn't want to any way

EEeeeiiioooou ! ~

It's not black magic

nor from some 'other side'

no potions in my purse

and I only have IT for

righteous guidance

not for bad or worse

and you might take note

if I tell you

NOT to go - PLEASE !

you are completely free

however

to be terrified of me

( but -ssshhh- don't tell anyone

you're really safest with me )

There seems to be a prejudice

left over from superstitious

Puritanical days

when in fact we ALL are gifted

with Higher Intuitive Self

and some don't 'know' IT

yet

I cast no spells

no I do not

but maybe I should try ! ~

And you may do

whatever

you think you are wanting

to be doing

but if I suggest a step

to the left

you might want to give it a try ~

In the old days

some would burn me at the stake

and call me a heretic

but make no mistake

my intuit can be a savior

and has never

not been

with me . . .

BBBBOOOOoooooooOOOOAAAAAHHHHHHHHHaaaa !

HAPPY HALLOWEEN y'all !

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

One-ness

Tenzin Gyatso

The Dalai Lama of Tibet

humble Buddhist monk

was given last night

The Congressional Gold Medal

in Washington D.C.

If I'm not mistaken he

mentioned the "small lies"

told by Politicians !

Go Tenzin !

He also spoke of one-ness

the unity that reality is ~

ALL is inter-woven

like I said in post earlier in the day

This is evidence to me

of what is traveling the

airways of the Collective

Unconscious

becoming Consciousness

and hopefully

eventually

Reality ~

He spoke of many things

apologizing for his

"kindergarten"

level of English

and then expounded

more eloquently

than most of us

'native' to the language !

I'm glad I did not

miss the message

It was the second time

I heard it

yesterday

that 'no man is an island'

and all is inter-dependent

yet we are so sure

independence

is the way ~

He asked for U.S.

support

after lifelong allegiance to

US ~

Sandwiched between

India and China

Tibet is getting 'roughed-up"

politically speaking

I wonder if we'll assist

or will we throw them under the

bus ? . . .

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX

The line

The long long

line

in the endless

time

from the big  Big

BANG ******************

chronicles

human nature

growth and development

conservatively ~

estimates our time

of arrival

long after T-REX

had come and

gone

as being recently

millennially speaking ~

In the biggest of all

pictures

we are the

new billion-year-old carbon

kids

on

the block and

though we haven't

evolved

to extinction

like most species

yet

we haven't been here

all that long ~

Humanities gestation

goes slowly

like a baby still tucked

in the womb ~

We're a Zygote in

space

at this time and

this place

in a spiritual

Zygote cocoon ~

And the Zygote knows not

from its left

or its right

or much about later or

soon ~

The primal mechanism

still runs in

to walls

again

again

and never takes the

tags off the pillows

under threat of

penalty of law

and it keeps doing Wars

killing itself for the win

again

again

and drives at a high rate

of speed within inches

of other driving Zygotes

in opposite directions

The Zygote

~ barely there ~

is sure of its

arrival

but is sadly remiss

and is barely a fish

and not close to being fetus

just yet

which depends on its

survival

like Gorillas in

the mist ~

and later

if

contractions

bring forth

The Infant Humankind

I would love to

incarnate

come - see what

we've become

when the sightless Zygote

gets its first slap on the ass

in the Spiritually enlightened

sun ~

That it doesn't

know

that it doesn't know

is the Zygote's main condition ~

It will be a long long

line

in the endless time

for the Zygotes

maturation

when some have jumped

placental walls

and carry

ammunition . . .

Domestic Violet

Semper Vi ~

Survivor . . . from the VORTEX